Learning about the “Love Cushion” and learning to fluff our own.

I coined this phrase over the summer of 2014 during some moment in time while I was in deep thought. The Love Cushion is a concept really…

With this concept of the Love Cushion comes this explanation….
We can get through ANYTHING in life as long as we have a fluffy love cushion. Our love cushion is made up of our friends, family, animals and basically what makes us happy.

During our life – our love cushion is ever changing by what and who we surround ourselves with.

Sometimes in life, through no control of our own – we loose parts of our cushioning and we find ourselves vulnerable to heartache and despair. It’s then when it is so important to reach around you to the cushioning that you DO have left. Your support system. It’s also important not to wear out that support system with needless cries for help. As we grow – we grow in and out of relationships. It’s important to find a happy medium with the fluffy.

When my mom died – I realized she and the family she held glued together was a huge part of my fluffy. I spent a huge amount of time not only grieving her, but grieving all that she held together. The gatherings, the news, the communication, the community – the LOVE. I realized that, although I had so much of this in my own immediate family, she held a huge part of it in the palm of her hand . And the day she died, it did too.

I cannot imagine being an orphan, yet this is how I felt. I know my experience is no where near that of an orphan. I just don’t know how else to explain it. What I learned was that even though I had my own family, there was such a void where mom’s extended communications had dried up – and so I started to make my own.

This is not something that is done overnight. Mom was 78 when she died. At her service we estimated over 1200-1400 were in attendence. You don’t touch that many people over night. She had spent a lifetime of fluffing her own “Love Cushion.” Her glass overflowed. I realized in order to fill my own void, I had to come out of my own shell… I’ve often thought I was a introvert. The more I think about it, I am not sure. Maybe a introvert with tendencies of extravertedness. I love being around and with people – but I need the time to be alone and recharge. I love the quiet time. I do very well with the quiet time.

So back to this theory of mine and the Love Cushion.
Overall — we need to build around us those whom we love, those who love US and do it in multiples. We need to be selfish to a degree – and do this in a manner that is good for us. If we are in an environment which is constantly requiring us to remove our own fluff – we need to acknowledge that it may not be a good “fluff” for us – and move away from it. If we are constantly being drained or saddened by our environment – We need to change it. We need to look for new horizons. We need to look for the good in everyday.

As our love cushion starts to get flat – noncomforting. It needs to be fluffed. We fluff it by phone calls, letters, visits, cards. Smiles. Time. Time – something that we all seem to have so little of is probably one of the most important things that can be given… Don’t give up your core self. In giving – and the good feeling it gives – we sometimes get caught in that and want to give it all. Find balance in the gift. Be True to the things that make you happy. If it’s not fun – and you are not happy doing it – then why are you in that space? It’s up to you to carve out your own happiness and decide exactly what you want out of your life.  Being happy is a choice.  

#payitforward  #lovecushion #bewhoUare #chooseyou #lovewins #itssofluffy #freewill